Tuesday, December 18, 2007

just a few thoughts

I'm not sure why this occurred to me tonight, but in less than 2 months, I will be 37. I'm not upset at the age. I'm okay with my wrinkles. I have liked my thirties. I feel good in my skin.

It's my twenties that I whittled away, and that disturbs me greatly. I was married, living the life (albeit a poor life) in la la land, working, playing, painting...and dealing with some major fears. I didn't cherish every moment or make the most (or even part) of the opportunities that came my way.

I don't spend much time thinking about regrets...but this one thing freaks me out...

If I'm not careful, it could happen again.

I don't want to look back and say that I missed my life, my kid's lives, my friend's lives. I never want to be too busy to have a latte with someone, make a new connection, open up to being inspired by something random. And truthfully, being on the right medication has helped this tremendously. But still, I don't want to waste this life...this vivid, colorful, painful, gritty, and joyful life.

I've been thinking about working on a life mission statement. It's been coming up a lot, and I think it might be time to make sure that I am living with purpose.

Anyway, this is what I'm thinking about.

So, tomorrow I will make a gingerbread house with the kids, I will turn off the TV, I will engage, make eye contact, breathe.

If you stop by and actually get through this long post, I'd love to hear ways that you engage with life. :)


Anonymous said...

The only thing I have been engaged with is Kleenx and my remote control!!
But..before this I did a ton a baking with the kiddo..even if it made a mess. I tried to let that go!!
Luv Ya!

Kasie @ ~The Art of Life~ said...

I like your idea of a life mission statement. We all have the best of intentions, but then life has a way of getting so busy that we forget. I know I do.
Thanks for the reminder!

Anonymous said...

Just stopping long enough to read your blog, reminds me of how I too believe and want to be. Turning off the TV, making eye contact and breathing~ Wow, what a concept. Although when I read it, I thought, oh I love how that sounds. We too are making gingerbread house tomorrow. May I be wise like you and enjoy every moment! Thanks!

Jennifer said...

WOW, I wish I could just get past the worries and constant struggles of dealing with others that are not as wise and nice! I hope you have a happy holiday and if you are really fixin to turn 37 you don't even look a day older than 30! So no worries there then for you! Oh and I just love the music playing on your blog right now!